DYING WITH DIGNITY

I’ve had the most amazing and wonderful and heart wrenching journey of my coaching career in the last little while. AJ engaged me at the beginning of 2025 to walk her palliative journey with her as an interstate online client. It was a journey towards heaven in a grace filled way that was extremely memorable.

I was a bit uncertain at first to work with AJ, because I had recently lost several people and was not sure of my emotional resilience. Sometimes our uncertainty does not match God’s plan for our growth and development.

Each step of the journey which took approximately 18 months was one where I saw the resilience, unwavering faith, joy, dedicated purposeful actions and beautiful accepting grace as AJ walked the trek home and I walked alongside her.

Andrew Womack eloquently describes the juggle between fighting and acceptance in life.

‘In the Christian life, you can’t lose for winning. God is on your side. If you lose money, he has given you the power to get wealth (Deuteronomy 8:18) parentheses. You can make it back again. If you are fired and Julie, God is your Source. He will provide your daily bread and will also provide for your reputation (Psalm 146:7). If you’re sick, you can be healed. He’s the master physician (Exodus 15:26). You can win in this life! But even if you die, you still win!

Yes we are the winners no matter what happens!

As time progressed, AJ and I discussed the supernatural miraculous healing power of God but also the acceptance of God’s timing for her life. My impression was that she was comfortable with God’s plan that this was her time to leave. In her 60s AJ was a recent convert to a faith, now having a beautiful and close friendship with Jesus and I felt that she was looking forward to that. I think most of us would be fighting the good fight with 50 prayer chains and a whole church praying for healing! There is nothing wrong with that! But for AJ, she was content, so we worked together for her goals to be achieved around health, church life, arrangements, spiritual growth and engagement during the time left to her. Woven throughout each component was the underlying goal to share her faith, her joy and her peace about her glorious destination with her friends and family so that they too would find the same hope that she had found.

For all of us this could be a game changer. We all want to know what happens after death. I have spent many years of research on near death experiences (NDE’s) vicariously through reading and seeking God plus checking with the Bible. (See John Burke for much on this topic). I am convinced beyond a shadow of doubt that Jesus is the only way and that life after death will be amazing. And that there is nothing to fear. So why do we?

I was with AJ the morning that she passed. I travelled interstate to meet her finding out the day before that she was now in an unresponsive state. And very close to the end. It seemed faster at the end than we expected. I went anyway, hoping that she would hold on because I knew how excited she was for me to visit in person. To meet for the first time rather than online.  

I prayed, sang, talked, asked questions as I held her hand all the time sensing AJ hovering between life and death alongside the spine-tingling beautiful weightiness of God’s presence in that room.

God tells us in Ecclesiastes 3:1-2 NLT that His timing is perfect:

‘For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. A time to be born and a time to die.’

What are your feelings about death? Do you live in fear of it? Are you doing everything you possibly can to stay alive for an extra minute, day, week, month or years? The world is consumed with health, exercise, fitness, supplements to stay here longer. Everything and anything that can add anything to your lifespan. I agree you want to live healthy lives whilst we’re on this planet, but when God says ‘time’s up’ then our time is up! In Job 14:5 the Lord tells us that our days are determined and that the numbers of our months are known by Him.

Have you watched someone pass? What was your experience? Are we really convinced that there is an afterlife in the arms of Jesus and that when we get there all the pain of our live will be over? If we really believed this, would we be so worried about dying? I don’t think so. AJ was totally in peace even though the cancer was spreading and towards the end she must have been in constant pain.

For you and I when we get our marching orders whether it be like AJ who gently, beautifully moved steadfastly towards the end even though cancer was eating everything away, there were no complaints, just a joy and a peace that the end of her journey was in sight. The other thing that was remarkable was that AJ had no fear. Why is this? Because perfect love casts out fear (See 1 John. 4:18) She had that. I want more of that. Do you?

I essence, I want to spend my last days, weeks and months like AJ did.

It was my absolute honour and privilege to walk with her to be to be the sounding board for her so that she could tell someone (me) all the things she wanted to, discuss all the angles on life after death and the journey towards the end that might have been difficult to discuss with friends and family who were of course hurting. ‘The Lord is so close to all his hearts are crushed by pain…’  

Psalm 34:18 TPT

If you and I have a friend or family member now that is moving towards that ending too, let’s encourage and allow for open discussions. Let’s pray and believe for healing but let’s also accept that this might be God’s timing so that we can support them on a beautiful journey to heaven.

AJ was convinced as I am there’s only one way to heaven and that is through Jesus Christ as our personal Saviour and friend. NDE experiences whether the people are Christian or other faiths experience a man between earth and heaven, life and death who is described in the Bible. Jesus.

This experience for me taught me that we can go heavenwards so beautifully, the way that AJ departed.

And I know where she is today and I’m looking forward to the time when AJ and my precious others gone before, greet me at the gate.

If you are on this pathway, please reach out to me or someone that you can comfortably speak with for your journey home.

‘ I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me will live, even though they die.’

John 11:25 NIV

‘[You] lead us onward until the end, through all time, beyond death and into eternity!’

Ps 48:14 TPT

God bless

Peta 

Click the Contact Me tab below to:

Connect

Share Your Thoughts 

Subscribe

Receive Daily Gems & Amens to encourage you daily 

Learn about Life Coaching or Couple Counselling